Water Walking with a Disability

In going through this 100 Days of Believing Bigger devotional my husband bought for me, it speaks about how as humans, we can be limited to certain things physically and mentally. But the one person who is not limited is God.

Everyone knows and talks about the story of Peter walking on water. We also talk about the story of a lame man being able to walk. But what if we took it a step further? What if that lame man was Peter. Or If Jesus would have asked the blind man to walk on water? Would we then be more understandable to his doubt? How scary it would have to be to not only see, but hear the sounds of the waves crashing in the ocean. To try reaching out, to first— find Jesus hand, and stepping unto something he could not see. What if that person? Is me.

As a person with a disability, I felt my voice disorder has been my glass ceiling to being able to obtain a higher level & higher paying position in my field of work. I would tell others that if I didn’t have a voice disorder I would be way further along in my career. BUT when I would read job descriptions of the job requirements of higher level jobs, my heart would beat just a little bit faster, my doubt of my vocal capability in the job would grow just a little be stronger, so I would stay in my current position for a lot longer than I would’ve wanted.

If I am honest of my thoughts, I knew my voice has not been my glass ceiling it has always been my mindset. God has continuously reached his hand out for me to step out on faith regarding my voice since I was in grad school— back then I was considering quitting because “what was the point on getting a degree in counseling if I had issues with talking?” BUT I took his hand anyway and I’m so glad that I did! . With each job that I nervously grabbed his hand, He has blessed me with promotion after promotion. The higher the stakes and more intense the job was — the more He blessed me financially. So why, after everything He has shown me was I still afraid to apply to certain positions? But it wasn’t really faith I was doubting. I knew if I put my resume out there I could get the interview. I knew I would get the job. It was doubting my own vocal capabilities and capacity.

Wondering how long would I be able to sustain the job? Those days my throat would be so sore from talking all day, those moments when I would be on the phone with clients and they would ask me to repeat myself. Those times clients would ask for me to call back because they thought it was something wrong with their phone connection because they couldn’t understand me. Those 5-20 minutes of discomfort would overshadow the years of miracles God led me across the waters. Wow. Just writing that stung a little. But I have to keep trying because I never want to look back and have any regrets. I never want my legacy to be that I got in my own way or that my future children (God willing) will think that a disability will be a distraction to God’s plan. There is no spiritual way to say this —except “APPLY!” (Lol ) So that is what I’m currently doing and also encouraging you to do. Apply to that job, apply your knowledge out into the world, apply whatever it is you feel has been limiting you and watch God promote your confidence, your finances, whatever that blessing is on the other-side of fear. God has never put me in a position to fail. He has always made room for accommodations that suited me perfectly . I challenge you to acknowledge your hidden truths of discomfort or what you want out of life. Ask yourself the same question Jesus asked Peter, in whatever situation/circumstance you are in ,

“You of little faith,” …, “why did you doubt?” (Matthew 14:31)

When you have found the answer, my affirmation to you to say out-loud:

I am Your child and I am limitless through You.