I’m prolific, so gifted. I’m the type that’s gon’ go get it, no kidding. -Nipsey Hussle
Fighting for the dream on what your definition of success is can come with much sacrifice. A sacrifice that only your immediate family or close friends may know regarding what hides behind the smile on your Instagram and Facebook posts. Sacrifices like:
- Making your last $20 stretch for 2 weeks
- Renting a room at friends’ houses
- Traveling and moving to multiple cities to find the job/career that’s leading to your dream job
- An unexplainable health issue forces you to resign your job for a year
- Selling your car just to keep you a float for a couple more months
- Walking and catching a bus for a year (don’t forget winter months) to grad school AND your THREE internships just to graduate
- Grieving multiple deaths in the family
- Failed relationships; lack of judgement
- Isolation from your friends because they try to understand but became more judgmental of your struggle.
Everyone see’s your struggle as an option, “why can’t you just pick any job til you land on your feet”, but you see your struggle as a sacrifice to become the person you always wanted to become. Its hard when there’s no one in your network who has already been where you are trying to go. So your faith continuously gets tested, questioned, and when clarity comes it’s tested again.
For 10 years this was me. Everything that was mentioned above was my sacrifice story. I was blessed to have friends and family send me money and pray for me along the way, but it was a rough grind. But in 2018, my season of DOUBT (aka drought) finally lifted! Back to back, God started replenishing everything that I had lost within those 10 years in one year:
- A new car in the price range/mileage I wanted
- Despite my voice disorder, God helped me find a job that accommodated my voice and still able to counsel people in crisis
- 6 months on the job I received a $10,000 yearly raise
- God sent me the man of my prayers and being married to him within 10 months
- a loving home/financial stability
Yet, somehow the feeling of PEACE was too surreal; too good to be true for me. For 10 years, my mindset had become paralyzed. Always waiting for the next ball to drop. FEAR & CONSTANT BATTLE was my lifestyle. My norm. My mantra had become, “I already know I’m going to have to struggle or go through some hurdle just to get what I want”. I felt like I was a mixture of Job— a person constantly suffering and Jeremiah— the “weeping prophet”. For 10 years I cried. A lot. I prayed a lot. I questioned and doubted God. A lot. The enemy attacked my mind and faith even in the midst of me trying to encourage myself and others through Starving Christians Blog. At times the enemy won. However, because of my commitment of continuous fasting, consistent tithing, and finally surrendering every aspect of my life, I’ve been in the season of :
VICTORY— an act of defeating an enemy or opponent in a battle, game, or other competition.
I was faced with the question of, “How do I continue to live in my peace and undo 10 years of negative thinking ?” The answer that kept coming up repeatedly was : Romans 12:3 For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you.
God was telling me, It’s not about You! His plans are bigger than WHEN the next trial comes. Transforming our mind —is to renew our mind daily, in believing that God has already equipped us to withstand every trial. To say I’m Prolific it means to produce much fruit or many works. There’s a greater work to be done inside of us! In Pastor Ron Carpenter’s sermon , Growing Pains, he said, “every time something bad happens or trouble comes we are quick to say I’m in a bad season of my life.” But he states, HOW we respond to trials determines how long we stay in that particular season. If you had a temporary problem but ended up staying in it a decade , it could be because you reacted improperly to that trial. You may be in the best season of your life when you are having the most difficult struggles”. If I did not go through my decade , I would not be able to truly appreciate what I have now. I would not be as financially responsible as I am now. James 1:4 says, “ Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” So if you are trying to be the next best selling author or screen writer, keep writing. The next best basketball player, keep hooping. Whatever it is. Keep living. Keep running towards your dream.
There may be some pain or hurdles along life’s journey, but we always have the Victory, hold your head up high— THE MARATHON CONTINUES.